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Seriously smelly guy, you STINK!!!

Yes, I am going to have a little rant about smelly people. I think it’s time I did since it is some thing that effects all of us – well those who (still) have the luxury of being able to smell.

First, let me break it down. We’re all human and smell is a vital part of humanity. We live and die by scent, it can turn you on, or turn you right off!

I mean, I will follow my nose when a good smelling person is about. I remember once standing in a chippy packed full of people on a saturday night (or a Sunday morning, rather). I am standing next to a rather tall fellow and my goodness did he smell good!!! Now my extra surprise was that it was the end of the night and he smelled boxfresh!!! I’ve always wanted to use that word, lol and in my utter surprise I had to let him know!
Well, he had to crouch down a little to be able to hear me, which just shrouded me in his beautiful stink more, and back he had to get a lil closer, he had to return the compliment! Naturally!

Anyways that is one good example, I have more, but it’s not that time, and I particularly appreciate when a person of slightly taller statute smells good, the shorter population commends you, taller person!!!

Now let’s get to the nitty gritty. Bad smells!!!

Let me just say here, I am a Nursing Auxilliary and I work in a hospital. It is the home of bad smells! I have now been there long enough to tell the difference between rotting flesh and necrotic (dead) flesh even though both are pretty darn hurrendous. I am around bad smells for a living and at work, I do not mind. There is a legitimate reason for these bad smells, and by gum at least those people are in the right place!

So, smelly people of the outside world, what is your excuse???

Now I recall a time in my life when I was so ‘ depressed’ that I did not wash/shower for the best part of seven months – true story. I did have a tidy however, and changed my clothing to stop suspicion. I did ask close comrades about my odour and I was never, as far as I know, offensive to another nostril during that time. They could have been lying to me, but I was sure to ask my sisters – who never miss an opportunity to point out my bad points, so I am confident of their honesty. Go team!

Anywho, I can appreciate others may not have been so willing to cover up and that is their journey, and I may also add the mentally challenged and the drunken and drug abusing souls lost in those stupors, you are also not part of this immediate context.

No, these people are not under subjection here.
I am talking about Mister Narstee!!! Who gets up at some point in any day, in the clothing he was wearing the day before. He eats, he shits, he pretends to be busy doing work (work that is never completed nor will ever be because he will move onto the next project before finishing properly).
See, Mister Narstee thinks he is a perfectionist. Which is why he won’t finish. It won’t be good enough for his standard so always stays in that, nearly finished limbo.
Mister Narstee is really rather ruddy intelliegent too, but so arrogant with it that he thinks he is more intellectual than he really is.
Mister Narstee is so sure of himself that even when in conversation about a smelly person he will agree, so even an expose like this, he would be chuckling along obliviously about some other punk. No Mister Narstee, I mean YOU!!!

In your home he will occupy one corner, as well as your settee, and it will be the messiest (not to mention smelliest
) corner of your home.

This Mister Narstee even has the ordasity to wash his hands before meals – although the jury is still out on whether or not he does so after toileting (he leaves too soon, some would say).

Mister Narstee has never had his own place, and is a reluctant applicant to the process. He is also very well travelled as he has occupied the settees of most of his circle of friends.

Mister Narstee is not afraid to ask for help, but if you make the silly mistake of giving yours, expect that to mean doing it for Mister Narstee – ha! You fool.
Mister Narstee is also full of surprises. Just when you’re at the end of your tether with his stench, he takes a shower!!!

Am I talking about someone? Yes! However this is not based on one individual. It is my experience of a few people like this over my short lifetime so far. And no, Mister Narstee has not stayed at my abode, I couldn’t have that shoddiness in such close proximity!!!

Hmmm, even I am feeling sorry for Mister Narstee so I will shift my focus.
What I’m getting at is the mentality of such an individual. Who thinks the world owes them something but is fundamentally too damn lazy to take
what they’re ‘owed’.

It’s the sheer ignorance in which they operate, a guise, if you will and they are so wrapped up in there own infinite amazing wonderousness that us innocent bystanders have not only to endure there smelly odour, but a stinking attitude to boot!!!

Come on smelly dude aka Mister Narstee, FIX UP!!! The world is already at a shortage of decent men, and while you have the potential it is obvious that you cannot see past the end of your own nose – not to mention smell further than your own stench! (Every pun intended!)

*sighs* rant over, for now! Even though I could go on…


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